Nobody Asked Judy isn’t technically even open yet.
We don’t own the domain.
We have no readers.
We have made precisely zero dollars.
Naturally, we already have company history.
Today was a rather productive day at NAJ Headquarters, which currently consists of Judy, a computer, and an alarming number of opinions.
We finalized the look of Nobody Asked Judy: the red, black, and cream color scheme, the distressed graphics, and the little NAJ soda can that has somehow become the official unit of measurement around here.
We built the NAJ Rating System.
It goes up to a Six-Pack.
This will become important shortly.
We created graphics for the website, YouTube, and the assorted places where Judy intends to distribute opinions nobody requested.
Then it was time for the first review.
Rather than beginning with something conventional—perhaps a movie, album, television show, or book—I decided to review my therapist’s reaction to a song I wrote in tribute to Dolly Parton.
Because apparently this is what we’re doing here.
She listened to the song during our appointment while muted, which meant I couldn’t hear anything. Instead, I watched her face.
There were smiles.
There were crinkled eyes.
There was a progressively pink nose.
There were, I strongly suspect, threatened tear ducts.
Afterward, she told me I’d nailed it and sat back hard in her chair.
That was enough scientific evidence for me.
I gave my song a 12-Pack.
Again:
The NAJ Rating System only goes to a Six-Pack.
We broke the rating system on the first review.
I consider this an excellent indication of how seriously everyone should take our policies going forward.
Somewhere during all of this, we also realized NAJ needed somewhere to document its own increasingly unnecessary history.
And so Meanwhile, at NAJ… was born.
Its official purpose:
The completely unnecessary history of Nobody Asked Judy.
Which brings us here.
Nobody Asked Judy currently has branding, graphics, a rating system, a first review, a blog, and plans for considerably more nonsense.
What it does not have is the approximately $40 required to purchase its domain.
So that seems like a perfectly appropriate place to end Day One.
Current NAJ Corporate Valuation: $0
Available Capital: Not enough for the domain
Highest Possible Rating: Six-Pack
Highest Rating Actually Awarded: 12-Pack
Number of Rules Already Broken: At least one
Regrets: None